Saturday, 3 October 2009

castles in the sky



I was sitting in the morning on the balcony. It's pleasant to have the weather warm enough to be out there and to have only a slight breeze instead of the tremendous gales we've had here recently. I looked up and saw these cloud formations, so it was probably fairly windy up there.

When I'd taken the photo, I realised that because of the curious repeated formations, they looked like castles in the sky.

Now I'm in an odd position in my life. At a turning point. The way ahead is not clear, and although I have no fears for my future, it would be pleasant to have some glimpses of the shape it may take. So I've been dreaming castles in the air. My castles are not as regularly shaped as these clouds. It may be just me, it may be the stirrings of spring and new life but my castles can vary from day to day. Where will I live? What will I do there? Will I stay with son and DIL who are currently looking at yet more property. They don't necessarily want to live where I like, even though they have found some properties where I could have totally separate quarters. We live together well, but deep down I want somewhere my own, although I suppose something separate would be like that. I'm deeply grateful for them and the things they have done for me, but somewhere there's always a castle being built.
What's an important part of a castle? A knight in shining armour. This knight is far from shiny, he's due another coat of matte black. He is known as the "Sunshine Warrior" and is made entirely from parts of a plough and other agricultural tools. DIL bought him on a trip to the Hunter Valley. He needs a bit of attention, some of his chains are broken. What I'd like to know is if a knight in shining armour will live in my castle? He could have a few breaks, after all I'm still healing from a fairly traumatic time and some nasty, unpleasant times before that too. Then again, over the years I've learnt to be fairly self-sufficient, to live by myself, to live from my own resources. Still, who knows? Perhaps a shiny knight may be out there, looking to ride to my castle on his charger.

When i looked up the phrase about castles, I found the following lyrics which I actually did not know. I don't think they describe my feelings totally accurately, but I can certainly see something of my thoughts there.


do you ever question your life?
do you ever wonder why?
do you ever see in your dreams,
all the castles in the sky...

oh tell me why...
do we build castles in the sky...
oh tell me why...
are the castles way up high...
please tell me why...
do we build castles in the sky...
oh tell me why...
are the castles way up high...*


*Lyrics from lyrics Depot.

4 comments:

Rose Red said...

Interesting post Jan - I hope you find your real castle (and a knight to go with) soon.

Bells said...

oh it does look like castles! Sometimes I can see those turning posts as positive opportunities, and sometimes turning points are scary. Sounds like you've got a mix of both views going on.

2paw said...

Life is always throwing unexpected challenges our way. My only advice can be to try and see the positive and be accepting. It is not always easy, but sometimes good things can come from adversity.
I know whatever path you choose will be the right one in the end!!

Lynne said...

My first lyrics when I read the title were from Don McLean:
"And if she asks you why
you can tell her that I told you
that I'm tired of castles in the air, I have a dream I want the world to share
and castle walls just lead me to despair"!

Funny how the same phrase can conjure up totally different images/thoughts.